Wednesday, March 23, 2011

You wouldn't like me when I'm angry

Hi. I'm a week into a steroid treatment and I would like you to know that you suck, and your mother sucks, and your neighbor's dog sucks. If you look at me the wrong way, breath on me, or are generally anywhere near me I will go Hulk on you...or, I would like you to know that you are awesome, your children are awesome, and your sister's husband's hairdresser's son is awesome. If you look at me the wrong way, say the wrong thing, or don't attend to my every need I will cry like a heartbroken teenage girl.

My eyes are so dry I'm considering ditching the Visine for Vaseline; my indegestion and heartburn are so intense I've started breathing fire; I've gained ten pounds; my acne eruptions are rivaling Mt. Vesuvius; and I'm told I may grow a beard.

That being said, the goal of this is to counteract the autoimmune response that is exacerbating the nerve damage in my foot; and to repair some of the damage to my bronchials, improving my lung function. I'm willing to grow a beard for that.

The thing that got me really excited was being told that I am "healthy enough" to undergo these injections, as they had not even been an option until now because my body would not have been able to handle it.

All things considered, soul patch or Grizzly Adams?

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